


When Spidey says "YES"

by Apolline



Series: Wade Wilson's luck [1]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Humor, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-25
Updated: 2015-06-12
Packaged: 2018-02-27 00:19:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2671862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apolline/pseuds/Apolline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Deadpoo was used to Peter's constant "no". And unrequited love seemed not to bother him much. And one of the boxes in his head still believed that sooner or later Spidey will give up. Though the other box claimed that Wade'll never get anything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Когда Паучок говорит "да"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2444612) by [Apolline](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apolline/pseuds/Apolline). 



> It's first time I try to write in English... so sorry for mistakes. Actually it's my translation of the work I wrote in russian. I hope it's readable :)

Spidey often said Deadpool "no". That wasn't always the obvious "no". It could sound like "no, we are not killing people" or " heroes do not take money for their job", but however it sounded it was just another "no" which didn't bother the merc with a mouth much. But there were some "no"s which did really disappointed Wade (though long-term depressions are not his feature but never the less). Those "no" were like "no, we are not friends", "no, we do not look like lovers" "no, Deadpool, you can't stay here"... There were much more of these "no" which the mercenary could have classified into different groups according to its importance, the number of consequences, and frequency of pronunciation.... And any sounded NO immediately got its characteristic. Who said that in mad head there couldn't be a system? Even if he had the system only for weapon and Spidey's "no". It only marked the importance of this information. Deadpool got used to these negations and as in many other things he found some masochistic pleasure in it. And he really had some good memories connected with "no" situations.  
For example, once he heard somewhere that in some countries people paint eggs for Easter. So he painted a couple of eggs and draw his and Spider-man's masks on them. He showed this masterpiece to Spidey when they met and demonstrated him what a nice relations they (the Deadegg and Spider-egg) had. The hero hasn't appreciated Wade`s efforts and threw those eggs into mercenary`s head. What could be pleasant in this episode? Well, maybe the fact that after seeing eggs spreading down the red mask Spidey burst out laughing and was unable to be angry with the merc any longer.  
Or there was another case when the guy declared that he wasn’t going to help Wade but then collected parts of mercenary`s body all over the hangar. Accompanied by continuous chatter of the torn-off head he fitted extremities to the blood-stained torso. “Not the most pleasant memories” one could say. But that time all attention of the hero was concentrated on the mercenary!  
Generally, Deadpool was used to this everyday "no", but he was sure that power of his love could easily overcome these refusals. And unrequited love seemed not to bother him much. And one of the boxes in his head still believed that sooner or later Spidey will give up. Though the other box claimed that Wade will never get anything. So this is how the cheerful mercenary lived till the “yes” happened.  
"Yes" sank in the mercenary not at once. He still was saying something when he finally got what he had heard.  
“Wha?” Deadpool stopped and ceased gesturing with his hands. He slightly tilted his head sideways, showing how much he was shocked, because during all their conversation Spidey was in a bad mood and was diligently ignoring Wade but then suddenly he agreed with something. Wade was in panic, trying to remember what he could tell that wouldn't cause Spider`s denial. But he failed remembering.  
“I told you can stay at my place tonight,” the guy repeated.  
“Who are you?!” the mercenary growled. He overturned the hero on the roof preventing him from getting up.  
“Got completely crazy?!” Spider-man`s nape met the firm surface of the roof.  
“The real Spidey would never tell something like this, what the hell you want from me?!” on this phrase Deadpool got a web in his face then he was dexterously sent and pasted to the same roof.  
“You are nut,” Spider-man made the conclusion, looking as the pasted mercenary was swearing while twitching in a web cocoon. “You yourself complained that poor you have no place to stay.”  
“What have you done to Spidey, you bastard?!” the mercenary couldn't calm down, as he was sure that his Spidey wouldn't invite him to his place. So this stranger had stolen Spider-man's costume and wanted to entice Wade somewhere.  
“My God,” Spider-man sighed. “I am the Spiderman, or the web doesn't tell you anything?”  
“You've stolen his spider-gadgets! Just you wait! I will escape and …”  
“And what about my voice?” Peter wondered.  
It really puzzled the mercenary, but the sore brain quickly found the answer. “You are his spiteful twin brother!”  
“Why a twin?” the guy was really surprised, checking whether the mask was on its place and remembering that Deadpool had never seen his face.  
“Because you are spiteful! Ugh, I will get you!” the merc raged.  
“Precisely mad,” Spider-man sighed. “I leave you here or you will think again?”  
“ Arrr,” came the reply.  
“It means to leave,” the hero stated. The rain started pattering. “And today the thunder-storm was promised.”  
Peter looked at cocooned Deadpool and thought – he felt pity to leave this man in the rain, but on the other hand – what could happen to him? Was it really necessary to call this moron to his place? Why on Earth he had blurted out that offer? However, it was clear why – that day was an extremely unsuccessful day: citizens again grew angry with him, the SHIELD doesn't bother about him, so the feeling of loneliness filled his soul again. And here is this eternally happy loony who (what is strange) always treated him so kindly. Well, and the mood played its role. When Deadpool casually mentioned of human callousness and that the person with couple of suitcases with weapons has no place even to spend the night... and moreover added that old friends should shelter each other, Parker automatically agreed. When later he confirmed the invitation, he was pressed to the roof.  
The rain became stronger, and the hero in Peter won. He had to bind Deadpool better and to drag the mercenary away from the roof they were sitting before. The Merc continued kicking, but a little bit later ceased twitching and again started chattering like a magpie about everything including guesses about what "the spiteful twin" was going to do with the killer and what had already done to "Spidey".  
Why he had dragged the talkative psychopath to his apartment? Parker didn't know. It was possible to leave him on staircase of any building. Though, he was pity for people at those buildings. Sooner or later Deadpool would get out of the web captivity and god knows what he could do. The Spider-man put the spinning and looking round mercenary on a sofa and moved to a wardrobe, shoving there the bag in which he had common clothes. And standing at the wardrobe, Pete realized what a mistake he had made – until he gets rid of Deadpool he won't be able to unmask. And to get rid of him, previously having dragged him there nearly by force, would be strange and dangerous while the mercenary considers him no one knows whom. After some thoughts Spider-man took off his costume having left only the mask and got to get some clothes.  
“Spidey!” yelled Deadpool joyfully jumping up and falling from the sofa. “It's you after all!”  
“It took long time for you to realize,” Pete cautiously turned back. “I am afraid to ask but what caused your enlightenment?”  
“Your remarkable body!” Wade sang while devouring the guy with his eyes. At that moment Peter was pulling his shorts.  
“What?!” Parker was indignant.  
“I have an excellent memory,” the mercenary bragged. “Ah, these birthmarks!”  
(Especially that at a nipple) - commented on one of the voices in the head.  
[What are you talking about, look at that one below!] - interrupted the other.  
And Deadpool looked what surely roused Spider-man's indignation.  
“How can you remember? You were watching me, you maniac?!” such option really could frighten. Anyway the mercenary is dangerous person.  
“Don't you remember? That case with Chameleon? You were unconscious, and I as the true friend took your place by changing our costumes!” Wade reminded.  
“And?” Spiderman strained.  
“I remembered your body well,” Deadpool declared proudly. But, feeling the bad aura which surrounded Spidey he added, “I didn't see your attractive face, closed the eyes!”  
“Well, thanks at least for this,” the guy responded mistrustfully.  
“You are welcome!” the mercenary replied seriously. “You know, I wanted to tell you about spandex…”  
“For God's sake, shut up!” Spidey sighed again. Passing by Deadpool still rolling on a floor Pete went to the kitchen.  
“You have a silly look, Spidey,” Wade notified him, even without trying to get to the vertical position.  
“Oh, really?” Peter caught his reflection in a window. Yeah, really... in casual t-shirt, but with a mask on his face he looked weird, but what could he do.  
“Aha,” Deadpool confirmed, and then started to talk about some nonsense without shutting up even for a second.  
Parker drank his milk and found few eggs in the fridge – well, here is dinner. For some reason he remembered that easter case with Deadpool, it even was amusing. He put some tomatoes and bacon on a frying pan. Pete fried the eggs fast and sat down with his plate. The mercenary who before was talking at last noticed the food.  
“Spidey, hey, Spidey,” called he with pity, “I want to eat too. As you are so kind today - untie me, please?”  
“You behaved badly today, Deadpool,” Parker grinned, “you are punished.”  
“Whaaa?” Wade was indignant, however, that habitual refusals returned to use calmed him.  
“Oh, I'm joking,” Pete stood up and, after having looked at the mercenary, he took a kitchen knife - it was necessary somehow to get this moron from the web.  
“Wow, I didn't know you like such things,” noted Wilson seeing the knife in Spider's hand. “Though if it is you... I don't mind.”  
“Jerk,” Parker shook his head. “How else could I get rid of this web?”  
“Oh,” the mercenary sounded disappointed.  
Having disentangled Deadpool from the net Pete went back to eating. Before it he had filled the other plate with remains of fried eggs. Wade unlike Spiderman, who lifted a mask to free the mouth, took the whole mask off and began to absorb food. So what if it was just eggs, Spidey himself cooked it!  
When the mercenary took off his mask Peter started - it was not the first time he saw Deadpool's face but it is difficult to get used to such look though it didn't cause former disgust any more, now it was just unusual. Parker actually began to respect this person when he saw his face disfigured by an illness. That's when it became clear why Deadpool was who he was. Respect was caused by the fact that no matter what this man has not lost the will to live. However, possible that case was in the healing factor. Pete did not know what he would do if one day he wakes up with the same disease. But he was sure that he could not be as strong as Deadpool. Perhaps the person adapts to everything, but the adaptation of this particular person - it's something striking.  
“What? I have spoiled your appetite, yeah?” Seeing that Spider stopped moving his jaws, Wade grinned. Peter noticed that despite a smile there was something bitter in Deadpool's tone. The merc reached for the mask that lay on the table.  
“No, everything is fine” Parker gently pushed aside the mercenary's mask. “I was just thinking about things, I'm sorry.”  
“I better go,” Wade would never admit it but he felt uncomfortable.  
[He's staring at you because you're a freak. I bet the boy has never seen such a nightmare!]  
(He said he was just thinking. Spider is not prim young lady who'll faint because of some scars!)  
“Where will you go?” Peter was surprised. “You complained that you didn't stop anywhere.”  
“So what could happen to me, I am Deadpool!” announced the mercenary joyfully, being surprised that he refused to spend time with Spidey, moreover in HIS apartment.  
“Stay,” Pete waved a hand. “It rains there. And it's never boring with you.”  
“What do I hear?” Wade's eyes widened. “Spidey makes me a compliment?!”  
“Haha, think what you wish,” the guy shrugged. “Wanna some beer?”  
They took on a pair of beer jars, and Pete turned on the TV. Deadpool was chattering again, having forgotten his mask on a table. Parker felt envy as he was also tired of the mask and longed only to take it off.  
“Oh, to hell,” the Spider decided and pulled the mask.  
“Ah!” Wilson cried shutting his eyes. It seemed he had a point about Spidey's mask. “Are you drunk just with one jar? Or you've already forgotten that I'm here?”  
“Drunk?” Peter didn't get the point looking at the jar from which he made just a sip or two. “I'm not drunk. It's just the mask... It was a long day, I’m tired of it!”  
“But...” his reply was interrupted.  
“Oh, come on! If you wanted to declassify my personality, you would have done it long ago, you had opportunities abound. I do not know what's going on in your head, but it seems you do not to wish me any harm” concluded Parker. Then he looked at Deadpool, who still had hands on his eyes, and smiled. “Let me introduce myself, I'm Peter. And you can already open your eyes, I'm not going to put the mask back, you yourself complained of spandex.”  
Wade sighed theatrically and opened his eyes. He saw the outstretched hand.  
(Oh, yeah, we get acquainted again. He even introduced himself!)  
[He's sooo cute!]  
“Wade,” clutching the hand, replied Wilson and pulled Peter closer to him. “Spidey, I think we should date!”  
“What?!” Parker tried to escape the hug. “Let me go! What are you doing?! Stop it!”  
Wade continued to squeeze Peter in his hands until the hero cracked his beer can on merc's head. After that they began running around the apartment. Poor Pete even got up at the ceiling, thanks gods it was high. Only the wall was able to calm Deadpool. Spider sighed looking at the broken wall in the bathroom and then pulled Wade on the couch. Of course, the guy did not think that wall was enough to permanently shut the man down, even if he was thrown into it with all the force of Spiderman. But it was already night and Parker was rather tired. So after he got to the bedroom he immediately fell asleep forgetting about the rapid regeneration of his abnormal friend.

Awakening promised to be memorable for everyone.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the next day

Some alarming feeling woke Peter up. Firstly, he thought it was his spidey-sense, but no, it was not tingling. No, it was such feeling as any normal person could feel when someone stares them. The feel of foreign gaze on your body. This idea seemed ridiculous to Peter, as he used to live alone for a long time, and nobody had the key from his apartment. He moved reluctantly and opened his eyes. They met the wall near the door. His drowsy after a good sleep brain had a hard time to process what he saw.

“Damn!” Parker winced when he realized that those were the white eyes of Deadpool mask staring at him.

“Good morning, Spidey!” greeted Wade cheerfully.

“What the hell?!” was everything Peter could say. He remembered that he brought the mercenary to his place, and that the hole was made in the wall of his bathroom not the bedroom.

“Hm?” Wilson wondered. “You yourself invited me to your spider-nest, Spidey. You was rather pushy, you know. Don’t you remember, sweetums?”

“That’s not what I’m talking about! Why on earth there is a hole in this wall?” Parker tried to be calm.

“Well, yesterday you broke the wall to the bathroom with my head”, Wade tried to explain.

“The bathroom! Does my room have anything to do with bath?” asked the guy strictly.

“Well, if you take this clothes off then I could see something in common”, Deadpool smiled and it was seen even through his mask.

“Back to case, please”, Spidey demanded, ignoring the hints. “Why is the hole is here now?”

“Oh, Yeah! When I woke up you were not at the room, then I thought that you might be happy if I fix the hole in the bathroom. But when I was on my way I stumbled over something and…”

“And you’ve made another hole with your head”, finished the young man.

“No, not exactly”, the man scratched his head. “I made it with this”

Wade shoved a heavy sledgehammer into the hole. Peter looked at it with wide eyes. Firstly, in his apartment he had no tools other than screwdrivers. Secondly, it was not clear how "lucky" you have to be to a fall with a sledgehammer in hand and to break the wall, not the floor.  
Pete looked at the alarm clock near his bed.

“Where you even got this at six a.m.?” Said the guy, trying to find at least some logic in what was happening.

“Oh, your neighbor gave it to me…three hours ago or so,” responded Wade peering at the room again.

“A three o’clock? You went to my neighbor at this time of night?” Peter was shocked that wade was still alive; his neighbors were not very friendly especially in the middle of the night. Well, He had a healing factor after all…

“What’s wrong? He kindly passed me this thing, but, you know, he has not very accurate eye. Can you imagine, this hammer kicked my head when the guy was throwing it to me!

“I don’t want to disappoint you, but I think that he has rather accurate eye”, Parker sat on his bed. Then he looked at Deadpool again and remembered what woke him up. “Wait a minute, you’ve broken the wall and...?”

“And I saw a sleeping Spidey-angel!” told the mercenary showing how excited he was.

“And you watched me all this time?” he felt nervous. “No, don’t answer! I don’t want to know about it.”

“As you wish, Pete” replied the man still smiling. “As you wish.”

(And you yourself wish he was still sleeping so that you can watch this cute face a little bit longer)

[Or better to use the hole in bathroom for peeping…]

“Yeah, in bathroom…” repeated he dreamily.

“Excuse me?” the young man couldn’t get what the merc was talking about.

“It’s nothing”, Wade answered. “Though, if only you allowed…”

“Allowed what?” the boy looked at him with suspicion. But then he remembered what a mess Deadpool’s mind was and decided not to get into what this man imagined for himself.

Peter stood up and stretched, trying to find where he left his t-shirt. He was used to sleeping in shorts and the guest in his flat wasn’t changing his habits.

[Oh, yeah, baby, do it again!]

(Just don’t repeat this aloud! We’ll frighten him away)

Wade bit his lip not to blurt out anything at all, watching as the object of his unrequited love stretched again sleepily and went searching for his t-shirt. All the time of the search, the young and desirable body was flickering in front of the man, moving from one end of the room to the other. Voices in his head commented everything in unison, and his brain was melting from the awareness of how domestic the situation was. For a moment Wade imagined that it was their ordinary “family” day – sleepy Peter murmuring something while searching for his clothes and happy Wade watching his beloved hero and thinking about doing something nice. Something that that any person who has warm relations with his partner will do… cooking the breakfast, for example. Sure, the breakfast! He would come close to Peter, hug him gently from behind and nuzzling into his hair he would ask him something like:

“What would you like for breakfast, sunshine?” he noticed too late that he was saying it aloud.

“What?!” the boy was taken aback. Wade’s voice sounded strange. Not fanatic, not joking… not anything it sounded like usually. His voice was provoking Peter not to shout at him as it often did, but to smile and just answer the question.

The mercenary decided that it was too late to step back, so he repeated.

“Breakfast, Peter, the breakfast!”

“You are cooking?” said the hero skeptically.

“Sure! My pancakes are legend!” claimed Wilson proudly.

“Ok, ok, let it be so”, Parker massaged his temples trying to systematize all this inside his head. “Do what you want – pancakes or whatever, but I’m going to have a shower. Yeah, I need to refresh for sure.”

The boy came out of his room and finally saw Deadpool in full-size not just a mask in a hole. He passed him by and went to the shower. Wade followed him. Peter stopped in the doorway. 

“And where are you going?” asked he indignantly, seeing that the man was following him.

“To help rubbing your back?” tried Wade.

“You. Go to the kitchen!” and the door slammed in front of the merc.

[My dear comrades, that is completely a fiasco!]

(We should have told him that you was going to fix the wall)

[Or pretend that you are a plumber!]

“Yeah, the plumber is a good idea, girls do like plumbers!” agreed the man.

(Are you both dumbs? The plumber, seriously? We don’t even have the tool…)

[And Pete is not a woman…a maid then? Boys love them!]

(Idiot)

“Oh, shut up you two!” muttered Wilson. “But fixing the wall is an idea…”

“And don’t you dare peeping!” Peter might have heard him.

“I would never”, promised Wade peeping through the hole. “Fuck!”

The hole was webbed.

“Yeah, never”, - Peter agreed.

Wilson sighed and went to the kitchen. When he looked inside the fridge he decided to give up an idea to cook any pancakes. But he hadn’t lost his enthusiasm and fantasy, so he started making the breakfast for his beloved superhero. He was so deep into his dreams about a cozy family morning that he didn’t notice being no longer alone in the kitchen. 

 

Peter finished his shower quickly and it helped to gather his thoughts. After thinking about all this, he made the conclusion that everything is as ok as it could be with Deadpool. “With Wade”, he corrected himself, reminding that their friendship got onto new level. Maybe the boy hadn’t told the man about it, or maybe he did once, but Spider-man really saw Deadpool as a friend. However, their life views were completely different from time to time. Wade was the only person in his superhero life. Whom Parker could call a friend. Besides, in his everyday life he hadn’t that many friends either.

When Peter left the bathroom, he was surprised to see that his webbing on the hole wasn’t touched. That meant Deadpool had some idea about politeness. Pete went to the kitchen, which was a part of the hall, and found Wade there, baking something in the oven and highly engaged into preparing coffee. The strong aroma of this drink mixed with another of something baking and the air smelled so delicious! It was strange but the man didn’t notice him, and Peter got an opportunity to watch him. 

The Merc looked unusually calm and even in his costume seemed to be a nice part of a good morning. He was stirring the coffee and singing something to himself, moving with his tune. Peter thought then that it was nice to have somebody cooking for you, when you (being sleepy in the morning) don’t need to worry about overfrying the eggs or to forget about coffee. It’s also good when you don’t have to wake up alone in this flat, thinking about what misfortunes the day’ll bring, and it was nice to have someone entertaining you with some jokes or tales. If he was to think about it, Deadpool always appeared in time. And it doesn’t matter if it was about some bad-guy’s attack or just bad mood. When he did anything for Peter, he never asked something back, only gave some joky hints. But Peter knew it was just a habit. And all these made Peter to think if the merc got anything good from him. The boy tried to remember but it seemed, that yesterday’s invitation was the only good thing he did for Wade. And Peter could remember lots of refuses he gave the man. Peter now had pangs of conscience.

The way wade acted yesterday after receiving an invitation only confirmed what a bad friend Peter was. 

“Oh, Spidey! You are here! I’ve almost finished,” Wade noticed Peter and turned to face him.

“I can see it,” Peter smiled.

“Is everything ok?” Peter’s behavior was little bit frightening for the mercenary because of its unusualness. The hero rarely gave him smiles, and never such smiles! This smile was warm and kind – not one of those Deadpool usually got.

“Everything is fine,” told the boy. “What do we have for breakfast?”

“A cheesecake,” answered the merc automatically.

([Something is wrong])

“Indeed,” the man agreed with his boxes.

Peter understood that the last phrase wasn’t for him and pretended no to hear it. Wade took the cake from the oven and they started their meal. Merc rolled up his mask but hadn’t took it off. He didn’t want to ruin Peter’s appetite, though the guy told he didn’t mind his face.

Peter ate a piece of cake with great pleasure and wanted to take another one when he noticed that Wade decided not to take off his mask. The young man didn’t like the fact the older man still worries about this appetite-theme, so he just got the merc’s mask and pulled it off. The man jerked and looked at Peter with confuse. 

“Come on, it's fine,» told the boy while eating another piece.

The man hummed but tried to relax. He was still nervous and talked a lot. Though Peter preferred this chattering to those lonely breakfasts he had before. So when he was washing the dishes he finally got an excellent idea.

Deadpool stood behind him, thinking about what a wonderful morning he had. His enamoured and insane head decided that they needed some showy gesture to finish this perfect breakfast.

(The kiss will suit!)

[I agree with that]

“Only if at the back of his pretty head,” thought Wade. “Then he won’t have time to escape.”

(But we’ll have to run)

[Very fast]

(And probably to Canada)

“But that is a good price for it,” said the man quietly.

Wilson stealthily approached the boy and was about to hug him, when the young man spoke. Wade stilled in a weird pose.

“Wade, you know, the landlady offered me to move to the bigger flat on the next floor…it would be helpful to have a flat-mate to pay the rent, so… maybe you… I mean if you want to…”

“Yes!” Wade shouted when he understood what Peter was saying. “Yes, I want!”

“I haven’t told the rent price yet,” Peter tried to say, but he was hugged so tight that couldn’t speak.

“It doesn’t matter, I agree!”

(We will agree with anything, even being your slave if you ask!)

[Yeah, a slave especially!]

“God, you are shouting as if you were a bride and I asked you to marry me,” Pete sight. “Please put me down!”

(Marry him?)

[A Bride!]

“Yes, you can kiss the bride!” Wade still was hugging Peter and tried to kiss him.  
“Wade!” The boy kicked him with his spider strength. Peter finally got out of this embrace. “I’ll call the landlady…”

And he went to search for his phone.

“Spidey, you are the best!” Wade cried.

“Shut up, for god’s sake,” rumbled the boy.

Thanks to the hole in the wall, Wade heard the words “Hello, Mrs Hattil?...This is Peter, I’m calling to speak about you offer…Yes, positive… Yes…”  
This was the most important “yes” in Deadpool’s life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me rather long to post this chapter, yeah? I think I hate translating my own works, its weird because the way i think in russian and in english is little bit different... it's hard to explain)


End file.
